Wednesday, February 26, 2014

A Tale of a Great Sandwich

A few summers ago, after consuming a particularly delicious sandwich from Whole Foods, I wrote a story about it. 

I decided it was a blog-worthy addition. 

Here it goes:

There once was a veggie sandwich at a fancy, North Shore Whole Foods. 

It was purchased and brought across the City of Chicago lines, where it sat overnight in a fridge. 'What will my destiny be?' asked the sandwich. 

"Certainly a sandwich of my size is destined for a rather large, hungry human." 

The sandwich rested overnight in the fridge, right where a Costco chicken carcass had previously sat.

Then the morning came and the fridge opened. The sandwich had it's first peak at it's probable eatter, and it was, a woman. The sandwich had only a brief look before being stuff into a Land's End lunch bag. 

The sandwich then felt a door close, walking, a bus, more walking, an elevator, and The sandwich sat in the darkness of the lunch bag for a few hours.

Around 11:30 it happened. The bag was opened and the sandwich was pulled out of the bag. Now the sandwich got a proper look at the eatter. 

The sandwich chuckled, "This woman is no match for me! She will never be able to finish all of my deliciousness. She will talk a big game, but in the end, she will have to quit. mmmwhhawwww....!"

The sandwich was unwrapped and had a proper eye-to-eye with the woman. In true form and full confidence, the sandwich was ready for what lied ahead. 

The first bite was tiny.

"She's never going to make it!" said the sandwich

But they continued, and continued. 

Suddenly half the sandwich was gone. The woman set the sandwich down. 

"Ah ha! I knew it." said the sandwich

After a short break and email check, the woman picked up the half-a-sandwich. This time the look on her face was more serious. The sandwich noticed a marathon training schedule close by.

"Oh no, she's one of those." he said in one of his last breaths 

It was then that the sandwich knew - he was a goner.

The End.

No comments: